Why does the weird stuff alway happen to us?
by Suckerpunch
Summary: D&D Inc. have found out about the power of the Pharaoh. And, of course, they just have to go after it. Chap 6 is now up. The duel between Yami and Noctu concludes!
1. First Impressions

Mark: Hello, well this is a new story and a new pen name, I think I'll just go ahead and get things started right off. Author's note will be at the end. Oh, and I don't write in script, that's just for authors notes.

Title: Why does the weird stuff always happen to us?

Rated: PG-13

Summary: Darkner & Darkner Inc. have found out about the power of the Pharaoh. And, of course, they just have to go after it. This sends everybody's favorite multi-colored hair duel and his friends hurling headlong into a struggle to save the world, again.

* * *

Chapter 1, First Impressions

Yugi Moto was sitting in his 7th hour class. He was only paying mild attention to the teacher, as he was daydreaming. About what nobody is certain, however his friends in the back row have their own ideas.

"I bet he's dreaming about saving some small helpless bug and being it's friend or something like that." Said the not-so-logical but ever-so-lovable Tristan Taylor.

"Naw, Yug is a nice guy I ain't gonna lie to ya. But he is a guy, I'm bettin' he dreamin' about dat Rebecca chick over in da States." Replied another of Yugi's friends Joey Wheeler.

"No, I bet he's dreaming about dueling. I mean come on, that's what Yugi does." This time the comment had come from a rather attractive young lady named Tea Gardner, another of Yugi's friends. If you hadn't noticed, Yugi was a popular guy. Despite being 4' 0'' and have spiky tri-colored hair. Oh yea, and that whole having an ancient pharaoh sharing his body thing. But then again, you already knew that.

"No, I bet he and Yami are have some kind of kinky gay love ritual."

The three glared at Seto Kaiba, definitely not one of Yugi's friends. Though, at least he wasn't an enemy anymore.

"NAW MAN! IF HE'S DREAMIN BOUT ANYBODY IT'S REBECCA! I CAN SEE IT NOW," Joey put on a face that was meant to copy Rebecca's, "Oh screw me Yugi! YEA, AND HOW COULD YOU SAY DAT ABOUT YUG AND YAMI! DEY SAVED YA BUTT DOUSANDS A TIMES!"

"Mr. Wheeler." The rest of the class giggled as the teacher addressed the blonde hair student, "I do not know what your fantasies are but I'd like to remind you not to pursue them in school."

Joey sat down, shut up, and wished he could crawl into a hole and disappear. Thankfully the bell soon rang.

The four went out for pizza, not always a usual experience when you have an ancient Egyptian pharaoh living inside you. Then they went over to Yugi's house, like always, I mean, it's a friggin game shop, who wouldn't? Eventually though they all went back to their respective houses, leaving the body mates Yugi and Yami alone in the house, Grandpa was on a free vacation in Jamaica. He won it off the Old Persons Television Network. Go figure.

"Bye Joey. See you tomorrow."

"See ya lata Yug." He replied and closed the door behind him. Yugi yawned and headed up to bed.

'So Yugi, we're you surprised to find Joey knew exactly what you were day dreaming about?' the spirit mocked through their mind link.

'Yami, I promise I'll call over to Egypt and tell Isis you masturbate furiously to her picture in you soulroom every night.'

'I'll be good.' The pharaoh pleaded in mock terror.

Yugi brushed his teeth, put on pajamas, and hopped into bed, setting the puzzle to the side.

'Night Yami.'

'Night Yugi.' And with that, the two focused on sleep. And while they found it, Yugi did not rest, for someone did not want him too, for he found himself, in a nightmare.

He was standing in a long corridor, no, Yami was standing in a long corridor, Yami was in control of the body. Joey, Tristan, Tea, and someone in the shadows that he couldn't see were standing behind him. He tried to ask the man's name but he wasn't in control of his own body. Soon he found himself in a duel. His opponent was shrouded in darkness as well. It soon became apparent that he was winning the duel, but then something went terribly wrong. Suddenly he was being sucked into a swirling vortex of teal light. He tried to resist but couldn't. Neither he nor Yami had the strength to resist the power of the vortex, soon, he screamed in frightened resistance, but it was futile.

"NO!" Yugi shot out of bed, drenched in a cold sweat.

'Yugi! What's wrong?'

'Nothing, I just had a bad dream.' Yugi reassured his other half whilst catching his breath.

'No, I was awoken by a great dark power. I came out in my ethereal form and noticed you tossing and turning right before you shot up. The darkness was affecting you Yugi. Are you sure you're alright?'

'Yes, I feel fine now. I say we should both get back to sleep.'

'If you really are well, then there is no reason not to.'

'Goodnight'

'hn'

* * *

In a dark business room, two men in suits sat in chairs watching a large screen.

"And now I play, RAGNAROK!"

"NO! THIS CAN'T BE!"

"He is a very skilled duelist, isn't he my brother?"

"The Pharaoh is the one with skill, if we can take his power out, then we rule both worlds."

"I wouldn't underestimate the boy either John. He may not have spiritual powers but he is a skilled duelist in his own right."

"That may be George, but they still share the same body. And the power of our new cards will be too much for them to bear. Even with the help of Wheeler and the rest of his friends."

"That's what our Egyptian friend up there on the screen thought, look what happened to him."

"True, but the Pharaoh was meant to use that power that Marik had."

"Well then, how about Dartz, that was a power even more ancient that the nameless Pharaoh."

"True, but that's what lets us win!"

"I don't quite follow you brother."

"You never could plan for the long run George."

"And you never could see what was happening at the moment John."

* * *

Yugi awoke to the sound of the alarm clock. He got up and got ready to go to school. He met Joey, Tristan, and Tea on the way.

"So, did you boys study for the history test today?" Tea asked, cheerful as usual.

"No." Joey and Tristan said in unison. Yugi just chuckled under his breath.

'Yugi!'

'What is it Yami?'

'That dark power from last night, it's source is coming close now.'

The trio had noticed their shorter member lagging behind.

"Hey Yug, everything alright?"

"No, someone is coming, someone with power." The deeper voice and intense body language, not to mention the boost in height, let everyone know that Yami had taken control of the body.

"Really? Where?" Tristan said frantically searching around for a sign of biker thugs, rare hunters, or some kind of personal body guard strike force.

"How very omniscient of you, Nameless Pharaoh." The four turned around and were faced with a casually dressed man.

"Hey, you don't look like a henchman." Tristan said, ogling the guys, unspectacular looks.

"He doesn't look like hes gonna be too much trouble, you sure dis is da guy Yug?"

"Yes, Joey, I am. Who are you and what business do you have here?" Yami inquired to the man. He was a tall man, athletic build, he looked like a runner. He wore gray sweats and a white sweatshirt. His blonde hair slicked back and his icy blue eyes focused on Yami.

"My name is Dustin Dawes. I am a hired duelist for Darkner & Darkner Incorporated. I am here to give a message and issue a challenge."

Yami was starting to become vexed, "Your message?"

"You certainly do get straight to business don't you? Well, you are being invited to a private tournament being held by Darkner & Darkner. Along with several other 'special' duelists you will battle until you gain enough puzzle pieces to figure out the puzzle. It will show you a map to the building where you will await further instructions."

"You speak as though we have no choice."

"Well, you don't, not really. We know exactly were your Grandpa is, and if you don't comply I'm afraid he may never return from his island vacation."

Yami's eyes narrowed with disgust, "I accept your challenge."

"Good, and you too Wheeler?"

Joey looked shocked, "Me?" he said pointing to himself, "Well, ya sure! I'll help Yugs anytime!"

"Good, good. Then here are your puzzle pieces." Dustin tossed 5 pieces to each duelist, "Unfortunately you will have to bring your two friends along because we can't have any witnesses.

Yami was just a few seconds away from Mind Crushing this cocky bastard into submission. "So, when does this tournament start?"

Dustin laughed the laugh that an adult might use when a child asked a silly question. "Right now Yugi." He pulled a small green and sliver pod about the size of a baseball and pressed a button.

"What do you think you are doing Dustin?"

"Why, taking you and your friends to the Dark Tournament of course." The pod gave a green light that consumed Dustin, Yami, Joey, Tea, and Tristan. After a few seconds the green light failed, and the five were nowhere to be found.

* * *

Author's notes:

Mark: Well, what do you think so far? Good, bad, cheesy? It will speed up next chapter, and definitely get more serious. Anyway, if you have ideas for a duelist and some deck strategy, I'd be glad to hear about it. Though keep in mind I'm not an actual duelist, so any key combos or special effects, you might wanna point out. Also just any tips on writing would be nice! Please R&R, thanks!


	2. New Tournament, New Enemies, New Cards

Disclaimer: Yeah, I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh, or anything close to it. I do own original characters and original cards used however. Though some cards may be original creations of other authors, namely WolfGeneral, though none of them appear in this chapter. P.S. go read his stories, they rock.

Chapter 2, New Tournament, New Enemy, New Cards

* * *

_Yami was just a few seconds away from Mind Crushing this cocky bastard into submission. "So, when does this tournament start?"_

_Dustin laughed the laugh that an adult might use when a child asked a silly question. "Right now Yugi." He pulled a small green and sliver pod about the size of a baseball and pressed a button._

_"What do you think you are doing Dustin?"_

_"Why, taking you and your friends to the Dark Tournament of course." The pod gave a green light that consumed Dustin, Yami, Joey, Tea, and Tristan. After a few seconds the green light failed, and the five were nowhere to be found._

The lowest level of the Meader Mansion exploded in green light. As the light faded, four youths and an older man of about 20 some stood. The four youths looked around, greatly perplexed.

Tea looked at her surroundings nervously, "What is this place?"

Dustin was more than happy to supply the answer, "This is the Meader Mansion. Meader was a rich man, however he owed a lot of money to Darkner & Darkner that even he couldn't pay back. So after he was 'punished' he graciously offered his home to whatever purpose we may use it for. This will be where the first half of the tournament is held, before the finals that is."

"So, Joey and I will be the duelists?"

"Why, of course Nameless Pharaoh. Why would things be any different?"

"This is a new tournament, so I am curious, what are the rules?"

Dustin started to chuckle, and then broke out into full maniacal laughter. "I was hoping you'd ask sooner or later. Well, you will be dueling two different types of duelists in this mansion. Tournament entries, and hired duelists. Duels with other entries will be decided amongst the opponents. Duels with hired duelist will operate as this one is about to!" And as he finished his explanation a duel disk, which had been absent earlier, swung into place on his wrist. Joey and Yami looked down at their wrists and found their duel disks were there as well.

"Well, will one of the challengers please step fourth?" Dustin inquired coldly.

Vexed at his foe's arrogance, Yami stepped forward, "I will duel you Dustin!" and with that Yami's own duel disk swung into it's active position.

"Very well, nameless Pharaoh."

Yami: 4000

Dustin: 4000

Dustin proceeded to explain the rules in a very condescending tone, "Each duelist starts out with 4000 life points. Tribute rules do apply, and if the challenger, that would be you," he said while pointing to Yami, "loses than he will lose all key parts and if no key parts are present, than you will be executed from the tournament." None of the four friends liked the way he had said executed.

"And if the challenger wins?" Yami asked, keeping his desire to smite the man.

"Then you gain a piece of the key." The Arian said in a matter-of-factly kind of way. He held up a small golden cylinder. Defeat five hired duelist and gain the key to exist the mansion, gain twenty puzzle pieces and solve the puzzle to find the build with the finals. Understand?"

Yami drew a smirk on his face now that he had been fed all the information that this lackey knew, "Yes, now I think I will be defeating you and taking the first key piece!"

"We shall see." Dustin drew five cards and then six, "Being I just gave you transport to the other side of the world, I think you owe me the first move."

Behind Yami, his companions were visible shocked, as was the companion in his head.

'_OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD? YAMI WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO?'_

'Calm down, if they have the power to get us here they have the power to send us back.'

Yami drew five and nodded, "By all means."

Dustin looked his hand through and frowned. "Well this does me little good. I play two Pot of Greed! This allows me to draw four cards." Dustin did as he said and smiled at his new options. "Your done Nameless Pharaoh, I set one monster face down in defense mode and four cards face down. End turn."

Yami drew his sixth card. "I set one card face down and summon forth the fearsome Silver Fang (1200/ in attack mode!" A silver furred wolf appeared on the field and howled in zealousness. "Now Silver Fang, attack his face down monster!"

"You've activated my trap card, Reinforcements, which gives my monster 200 more defense points. So all you've accomplished is revealing my Kuribo! (300/400)." A brown fluff-ball with green feet and yellow eyes appeared on the field.

"If that is your best than this duel should be quick, your trap card doesn't save your monster, so say goodbye to your Kuribo!" Silverfang leapt across the field and bit down on the brown furball, which shattered.

"Fool, you've activate my second trap card, and let me introduce you to another twist in this duel! The Darkner Cards! Let me introduce you to the first and last one you'll ever see, Fiendish Trickery!"

Yami seemed intrigued, "Darkner Cards? What are those?"

"The presidents of D. & D. Inc. have made special cards of great power and given them to the hired duelist. Whenever a duel to any opponent is lost you must give up any and all Darkner Cards! Now, for you to face the power of my Fiendish Trickery card!"

Kuribo came out of the trap card, however now he was a larger black beast.

"Behold Bloodfiend Kuribo! (1100/900) Fiendish Trickery allows me to re-summon any destroyed monster as long as they are a fiend, and double their attack and defense power, plus 500 for every trap card that was used to defend them as long as I pay half of the monsters attack points each turn! Oh, and it has one other effect." As if on cue Yami's SilverFang exploded into digital pieces that soon vaporized. Yami's brow began to furrow.

"I end my turn."

On the sidelines Joey was wiping the sweat off his own brow. "Well if dats all dese new cards do den we won't be in too much trouble."

"Yea your right." Tristan agreed and Tea nodded as well.

Dustin drew and a snicker crossed his lips. "Good, now I here is where I would usually pay to keep Fiendish Trickery in play, but I reveal the continuous magic card Spell Economics! With this card in play I don't have to pay cost for magic cards. Now I activate the magic card Book of Sacred Arts! Now watch as it makes my Bloodfiend Kuribo stronger!(1400/1100) Now I summon Fiend Squad (1200/0) in attack mode!" A group of little green men carrying bags of dynamite materialized on the field. "Now strike his life points directly both my monsters!" The two fiends charged the Pharaoh.

"Not so fast Dustin! You've activated my trap card Mirror Force! This reflects your attack back at your monsters, destroying them!" A blue force field appeared rebounded the duo back on their side of the field. Then white lights shot out of the shield destroying Dustin's two monsters.

"HA! Thank you for the help idiot! Now my Fiend Squad's special ability activates! Whenever it is destroyed you lose 500 life points!"

Yami 3500

Dustin 4000

"And now behold as the true power of Fiendish Trickery begins to reveal itself!"

Bloodfiend Kuribo(2200/1800) and Bloodfiend Squad(2400/0) reappeared on the field, each twice their former size and looking twice as menacing.

Dustin's delight grew as he saw Yami's eye grow wider. "Yes Pharaoh, your beginning to understand that as long as Fiendish Trickery is in play you cannot win! HAHAHA!"

* * *

Author's Notes:

Mark: Woooo! Looks like Yami is in trouble.

Yami: Don't underestimate me, I will be victorious soon enough.

Dustin: Tch, yea right.

Mark: ... Anyway, please drop any words of praise, constructive critisms, or suggestions for duelists, tournament entries or hired duelists, or their decks, or either one. Or if you don't have any of those, that's ok too, just please review, it makes feel nice inside! :)

Next Chapter, Tricking the Trickster.

Original Cards used in this chapter

Fiendish Trickery(and all monsters that come of it)

Fiend Squad


	3. Tricking the Trickster!

Mark: Hello, and welcome to the next chapter, hooha!

Diclaimer: Mark/Suckerpunch, owns nothing to do with Yu-Gi-Oh, original characters and cards are his brain children, besides some cards that are created by other authors, namely WolfGeneral.

Chapter 3 Tricking the Trickster

_"And now behold as the true power of Fiendish Trickery begins to reveal itself!"_

_Bloodfiend Kuribo(2200/1800) and Bloodfiend Squad(2400/0) reappeared on the field, each twice their former size and looking twice as menacing._

_Dustin's delight grew as he saw Yami's eye grow wider. "Yes Pharaoh, your beginning to understand that as long as Fiendish Trickery is in play you cannot win! HAHAHA!"_

"Well Yami, I think I'll be a nice guy and end my turn after laying this card face down, enjoy your experience in this tournament while it lasts.

Yami's brow furrowed at the problem. He did not like what was happening here. Every time he destroyed a monster, it would come back twice as strong, and Bloodfiend Squad hurts him everytime it's destroyed. He looked at his hand, there was the possibility for a strong combo here, but he need just one card.

Yami swept his hand to his deck and focused on the top card.

'Heart of the Cards, guide me.'

He drew, and glanced at the card, his trademark smirk appeared.

"These Darkner Cards are nothing more than an annoyance, behold as I destroy you! I will first sacrifice my Sangan in order to summon forth the Summoned Skull(2500/2000)!" A horned skeleton with muscle tissue in-between it's bones materialized on the field and a menacing grow escaped through it's undead teeth. "And I lay one card face down. And then I play Mystical Space Typhoon! I can now destroy any magic or trap card I wish, and I choose your Darkner Card!"

"Not so fast Pharaoh, I activate my own trap card, Trap Jammer! This negate the effects of your silly little Typhoon, sorry but I'm not that easy. HAHAHA!"

Yami smirked as his opponents false sense of superiority, "You've activated my trap now Dustin." The arian duelist became even more pale. "Makiou the Magical Mist! It negates the effects of your magic and trap cards for this turn as well as powering up my Summoned Skull's(3125/2000) electric attack!" The holographic version of Fiendish Trickery exploded into vapor. "Now my monster, attack his Bloodfiend Kuribo!"

The Summoned Skull charged up and shot lightning out at the beast. It struck the menacing savage and destroyed him.

Yami 3500

Dustin 3075

Dustin growled in his throat. "You haven't won yet Pharaoh, I still have plenty of life points and I will defeat you!"

"I wouldn't count on it Dustin, I still have this one card in my hand." Yami stated, gesturing towards the innocent looking playing card. "And with it's help I will now put an end to our duel, I play POT OF GREED!" Yami drew to cards as sweat started to pour off Dustin. Yami looked at the cards and smiled a victorious smile. "Watch now as I put an end to you Mr. Dawes! I play Gaia The Fierce Knight(2300/1800)!" A knight in blue and red armor with two red lances appeared on the field and glared at his masters enemy from atop his steed. "Now, attack his life points directly!" Gaia charged and ran Dustin through sending him sprawling.

Yami 3500

Dustin 625

Dustin was shaken, but still mouthy, "HAH! For all your talk I'm still here!"

Yami just shook his head, "You just don't get it do you, you are done for! I now play the last card in my hand, Chaos Ritual! I now sacrifice my Summoned Skull and my Gaia The Fierce Knight to bring forth a beast of ultimate power, and the boundaries of Light and Darkness collide, now, appear my, CHAOS SOLDIER! (3000/2300)" A red haired man in blue armor wielding a large one edge sword and a shield appeared on the field with a deep bass grunt.

Dustin's eyes widened in shock, he was done for.

Yami didn't even bother to raise his voice when delivering the finishing blow, "And now, my soldier, liberate him of his final life points, and whatever key pieces he may have."

The Chaos Soldier swung his sword at the ground, and sparks flew across the field and enveloped the hired duelist, and as the smoke cleared, he lie sprawled out across the floor, his life points at zero.

Author's Notes: Sorry this chapter is so terribly short! I was pressed for time and I had to sqeeze this chapter into my schedule. I find it kind of funny that Dustin didn't even get one freaking turn in this chapter though. Oh well, please review with critisism, praise, suggestions, or duelists. Just please review! Thanks!


	4. Kaiba, Kaiba, Kaiba, andRex?

Mark: Sorry took a while to update, here's a quick grammar-less explanation if you care about it. Computer get broke, computer-smart bro-n-law perform computer surgery, computer un-broke, yay. Here new chapter of story, yay. OH and Marik, I don't think we'll be that lucky. (just kidding)

Disclaimer: Mark doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh! But we're guessin you knew that.

Summary: Kaiba fakes, and the real Kaiba appear, along with the appearance of an odd character thought to be extinct, it's a laughable calm before the storm.

* * *

Chapter 4, Kaiba, Kaiba, Kaiba, and… Rex Raptor?

The four, still in their school uniforms mind you, had made their way up from the basement to the 1st floor with little incident. Well, except for the bruises Tea gave Tristan for staring up her skirt, but that's a different story. Back to things that relate to the plotline, Yami was staring at the golden cylinder that was the first key piece, as well as the Darkner Card Fiendish Trickery, he, of course, already had come up with a killer combo to accommodate his newest trap card.

"You know Joey, because the two of us are working together we will get the puzzle pieces twice as fast."

"Ya got dat right Yug."

"So, where do you think we should go next sexy- I mean Yami." Tea asked.

"Well I think we should go up that gigantic flight of stairs."

Tristan looked around the room, "Hey guys, haven't we been here before?"

"Naw I don't dink so, why do you say dat?"

Tristan looked at a sign that said "Welcome to the Kaniya Mansion," Except Kaniya was crossed out and Meader had been written above it with a what appeared to be a giant sharpie. "Oh, nothing, I guess it's just my imagination." And with that, they headed towards the stairs.

"Did you guys hear a hissing noise?" Tea inquired.

"No but I see a duelist ova dere in da shadows, and he's all mine." Joey ran over, but then the man jumped out of the shadows and let out a rather annoying laugh.

He was tall, yet very scrawny, he wore a brown wig and had on a blue trenchcoat with green shirt and pants underneath. "I AM SETO KAIBA! MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I CHALLENGE YOU TO A DUEL!"

The four friends looked on with disdain.

"Your not Kaiba-chan." Tea piped up.

"Sure I am."

"No your not." Tristan added.

"OF COURSE I AM!"

"Naw ya not. Kaiba woulda challenged Yugs insteada me, plus ya look nuthin like Kaiba."

"I AM SETO KAIBA! I AM I AM I AM! AND TO PROVE IT I'LL BEAT YOU IN A DUEL!"

"NO! Your not Seto Kaiba! You can't be! BECAUSE I AM!"

A short fat guy in a purple coat robe type thing stepped out of the shadows. "AND I challenge Yugi to a duel, after you duel Joey, you wannabe!"

The four friends plus Wannabe Kaiba #1 started laughing.

"WHAT?"

"YOU LOOK NOTHING LIKE KAIBA YOUR SHORT YOUR FAT AND YOUR HAIR IS BLUE HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"And your all six of you pathetic." A newer, stern voice cut in. Coming down the stairs was a tall, broad shouldered man. Brown hair hung down to the end of his neck and fell all around his deep, piercing blue eyes. He wore a black shirt and black pants with a sleeveless white coat about him. It was the real Seto Kaiba.

"Hello Kaiba." Yami said indifferently.

"Are you still wasting your time with these fools Yugi? Well I find that to be the most pathetic act of al-" but our favorite CEO was cut short, by the Wannabes.

"NO I'M KAIBA!"

"NO! I'M THE REAL KAIBA!"

"NO, I AM!"

"NO, ME!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"ME!"

"SHUT UP YOU INSOLENT FOOLS!" The real Kaiba roared from the middle of the stare case, his blue eyes flashing brilliantly.

"Kaiba," Yami began, "We could use your help, if you Joey and I team up, we could get out of here in almost no time, and find the fiends who took us all away from our daily lives."

Tea made her agreement known, "Yea! I'm on my period already and I need some-" fortunately for all you readers Tristan put his hand over Tea's mouth.

Kaiba was reeling from the comments of the girl, but managed to answer Yami in his normal fashion. "Sorry Yugi, but I work alone, I don't need anyone else's help to win, and I make my own destiny." And with that he walked off.

"Damn, I'm gonna start callin dat guy One-Note-Kaiba." Joey said watching his rival walk away. Then he turned back to what had been occupying him before, "Alright you two time ta duel Joey Wheel-" But the two wannabes were dueling, we take you now to the exciting action.

"Allright now I summon my most fearsome and powerful monster, UNFEARSOME OR POWERFUL WARRIOR! (10/1½ ) Attack his SLUG WITH TUBERCULOSIS(1/-4)!

Wannabe Kaiba #1 3999

Wannabe Kaiba #2 3971½

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THAT'S MY BEST CARD!"

"Ok it's time to get going, this duel is going to take forever." And for once, they all agreed with Tristan.

They soon came across there next challenge though. Though it was in the form of something stranger than the Wannabes.

Rex Raptor.

Rex looked indifferently at Joey, Joey looked indifferently at Rex.

"Hey Joey."

"Hey Rex."

"How's it going?"

"Good, good, and you?"

"Fine, fine. WANNA DUEL?"

"HELL YA!"

20 minutes later…

Joey 2400

Rex 1100

"Sorry ta do dis to ya Rex, but I attack wit Jinzo(2400/whocareswhatthedefensepointsareanyway?), demolish his Warrior-Dino(1900/1000 with Cyba Shocka!

The tall man in green robes and armor built up a ball of dark energy in his hands and hurled it at the humanoid Dinosaur person, vaporizing it instantly.

Joey 1900

Rex 1600

Joey's eye boggled, "WHAT, HOW COME I LOST POINTS AND YOU GAINED EM?!"

"My trap card, duh. Meet the Darkner Card I earned against a hired duelist Wheeler, Counter Balance Reality! Anytime I am dealt a loss of life points instead I gain that many while you lose that many, so sorry to disappoint you but you'll only be hurting yourself now when you attack me, hahaha!"

Joey was perplexed, though Joey didn't know that because perplexed wasn't in his personal vocabulary. But what he did know was that because of Rex's Darkner Card he was royally boned.

"You and ya card can't scare me Rex! I end my turn."

Rex drew a card and then put it in his hand, leaving himself wide open for an attack, seeing as how he no longer needed to defend himself. "I end my turn."

On the sidelines Tea was getting worried, "Oh Pharaoh," she said, brushing up against him, "Rex's Darkner Card is too strong, if Joey attacks Rex, he'll lose life points and Rex will just gain them, what's he going to do?"

Yami could hardly respond because Tea's breasts where right next to his face, and he couldn't help but notice how perky they were. "Don't worry Tea, Joey's an expert duelist, one card can't beat him."

In the background Tristan was humming, 'Can you feel the love tonight.'

Joey drew, and gave a smile worthy of a tooth paste commercial, "It's all ova now Rex, I play the magic card I just drew, Ectoplasm! Thanks to ya own Darkner Card, ya just about ta lose! Ectoplasm lets me sacrifice monstas or life points to deal damage directly to ya!"

"You idiot, with my Darkner Card, that'll just give me life points and cause you to lose them."

"Ya, it would, if I was gonna attack ya wit it. Ya see I can't help but notice that your trap works for both of us, so when I should pay life points to make Ectoplasm work, I gain them instead, while you lose them! I'll charge up Ectoplasm by 1600 and that will end tha duel, I win!"

Joey 3500

Rex 0

"Damn! Oh well, here's our bet, 4 puzzle pieces, and since I have to, here's Counter Balance Reality."

"Thanks fa duelin me Rex, ya actually had me worried dere for a second."

"Good job Joey!" Tea said coming over.

"Nice one buddy!"

"Well played Joey, but one thing still perplexes me."

"What's perplezzotcs?"

Told ya.

"Well Joey it means… nevermind. Anyway, you've never had Ectoplasm in your deck before, where'd you get it?"

"Well I kinda stole it from Ryou's deck one day, ya see we bumped into each other and dropped our decks. Lata I found I had his Ectoplasm card by mistake, and I just neva remembered ta take it back."

"A likely story." Tea said suspiciously.

"Well good job Wheeler, I guess I'll be on my way now, one puzzle piece, one key piece, and no Darkner Card. All alone, no one to keep me company, or to cheer me on, just me, by myse-"

"We get da picture Rex, you can come along if ya want to."

"SCORE!"

* * *

Authors notes:

Mark: What can I say, I've always had a soft spot for Rex. Sorry bout skipping over a lot of the duel, 20 minutes of it to be precise. But it would have been boring, Rex has weak monster, Joey has stronger monster, Joey kill weaker monster, Rex's trap card hurts Joey, repeat cycle. So I figured just skip to the climax. Well, if you have any criticisms, praise, duelists, strategies, please review. Aw hell if you don't have any of those review anyway, I could use some reviews, even though I have more reviews per chapter than I have in a long time, thanks to those who have reviewed!

Original cards in this chapter:

unfearsome or powerful warrior

slug with tuberculosis

Warrior-Dino

Counter Balance Reality


	5. Duel Against the Dead, Part 1

Mark: Hello and here's the next chapter of, this fic…

Disclaimer: Mark doesn't own anything Yu-Gi-Oh. A few cards or duelists might be Mark's original works. Though some may be the creation of WolfGeneral. GO READ HIS STUFF!

Summary: A dangerous new duelist arises to bring Yami to his knees!

* * *

CHAPTER 5, Duel against the Dead, Part 1

"_Well good job Wheeler, I guess I'll be on my way now, one puzzle piece, one key piece, and no Darkner Card. All alone, no one to keep me company, or to cheer me on, just me, by myse-"_

"_We get da picture Rex, you can come along if ya want to."_

"_SCORE!"_

Yami, Joey, Tristan, Tea, and Rex where now walking in the mansion. All together they had collected 15 of twenty puzzle pieces and between Yami defeating Dustin Dawes and Rex defeating a hired duelist they had 2 of 5 pieces to the key. They had all reasons to be confident, though soon, they would be in the clutches of death itself.

"Well Yug, da way I see it, were three fourts of da way dere wit puzzle pieces, and two fits of da way dere wit da key pieces, so we need ta find another duelist."

"Well no duh, Joey." Tea said blandly.

"Don't worry Joey, we'll find another duelist sooner or later."

"More like sooner." The five looked the direction in which the voice had came. A man stepped out of the shadows. "So we meet again, Yuugi-Tasshi!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhAHAHAHAHAHA!" The youths couldn't contain their laughter at the sight of none other than WannabeKaiba #1

"Yes laugh it up fools. But I'm not who you think I am."

"And we know your not who you think you are, Mr. KaibaFan."

"HehehehahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"Whats his problem?" Joey inquired.

"I have no idea." Yami answered warily.

Soon, his body was wreathed in a dark aura. His eyes darkened and his voice heightened, then lightened, to where it was almost a whisper.

"Behold my true form you fools."

"_True_ form?!?" Tea shrieked.

Then the skin melted and his clothes evaporated. And a new man stood in his place. A scrawny, pale man, with long, unclean black hair, wearing little more than rags, stood up and with much noxiousness announced, "Now Nameless Pharaoh, it's time to duel!"

"Yes, I agree, on the line will be all my puzzle and key pieces, and the same for you!"

"Yes, agreed."

"But first! What the hell do I call you?"

Everyone face faulted due to the total breach of seriousness.

Getting up off the floor, the fiend said, "You may call me Noctu!"

Yami 4000

Noctu 4000

Noctu drew six cards from his deck, "I think I'll start us off with this! I lay 1 card face down and play the Headless Knight in attack mode! (1400/1250) And I end my turn." A suit of armor wielding a sword and shield, yet no head or helmet, materialized on the field.

Yami drew six cards and smirked, "You will live to regret this Noctu, I lay one card face down and I play Beta the Magnet Warrior!(1500/1000)" A man made of magnets wielding a sword and shield appeared. "Now attack and destroy his Headless Knight!"

Beta launched himself forward and cut down Noctu's Knight.

Yami 4000

Noctu 3900

"Fool, you've activated my trap card, Trap Hole! Your Magnet Man is destroyed!"

"Not so fast Noctu, I activate my trap card, Valkyrie Spirit! This allows me to revive my fallen Warrior and summon two monster of the same type or subtype as said monster! And I chose Alpha the Magnet Warrior (1300/1000) and Gamma the Magnet Warrior(1400/1000)! Now their special ability activates fusing my three monsters together to form Valkerion the Magna Warrior(3200/2500)!" A little gray magnet warrior and a medium sized pink robot appeared and the three monsters separated into parts and then combined forming a large winged man made of magnets wielding shield and sword.

"Now I attack you with my new monster, prepare to feel his wrath! Valkerion, attack his life points directly!"

Yami 4000

Noctu 700

"Your move, Noctu."

"Wow Yugi's even better than the last time I saw him duel." Rex stated excitedly.

"Ya, dese guys are pushova's Yug will make em inta mince meat."

Noctu merely drew and chuckled, "Fools, I now play the magic card, as well as the Darkner Card, Focus Power! Once played I am allowed to summon five monsters directly to the field as long as they have under 1000 attack points and have no special effect!" Five monsters materialized on Noctu's side of the field. They were generally small, and some type of fiend or zombie.

"None of your army has the strength to defeat my Magna Warrior!"

"But thanks to the power of my Darkner Card, your Valkerion is history! Once per turn before I attack I may pay 500 life points to focus all my monsters attack points on a total assault to your side of the field. NOW GO!" The five monsters raised their limbs and light emitted from them, and congregated into one ball of energy. "HAHAHA! The total amount of energy comes to exactly 3500! One 900 pointer, two 800s, one 700, and a 300! Now, watch as your monster is destroyed!" the ball of energy shot at Yami's monster, destroying it instantly.

Yami 3700

Noctu 200

"Well Noctu, you've managed to destroy one of my monsters, but you've whittled away the last of your life points, and you have very weak defenses, you are going to be destroyed in my next turn."

"Watch now, as I prove you wrong. First of all let us whittle away your life points, hehehe."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, none of my monsters have attacked yet. And you have no defenses!"

The Yuugi-Tasshi all stared with horror at Yami's empty side of the field.

"Oh no," Tea began, "Pharaoh has nothing left to protect him, and the monsters points total 3500, he'll hardly be left standing!"

"Precisely my dear. Now watch as the girls premonition comes true!" Noctu said sending his monsters on the attack, all colliding with the Ancient Ruler, attacking him with their claws weapons and teeth.

Yami: 200

Noctu: 200

Yami slowly picked himself up. He winced at the terrible pain.

'_I don't think we've been hit that hard since we last dueled Marik!' _Yugi thought threw the mind-link.

'Yes, but don't worry Yugi, together and with the Heart of the Cards, we will not be stopped by this low class trickster.'

Yami stood and made his confidence known, "You have managed to make our points even, but now it is my turn and almost any of the monsters in my deck could destroy you with one attack!"

"Too bad my turn isn't over Nameless Pharaoh! I now play Wobki the Healer! This magic card raises my life points by 1000!"

Yami 200

Noctu 1200

"And lastly but not lest, I play the magic card Dark Fusion! This summons the Monster Dark Mist! It is created by sacrificing all monsters with zombie, fiend, or dark subtypes. Which would incorporate all my monsters.! Dark Mist(3500/2450), come forth!" A black mist appeared and gobbled up all five of Noctu's monsters. "Unfortunately I can't waste you this turn. Take your last pathetic move!"

Yami called forth Yugi, and the two combined their minds and souls, laid their hand on their deck, then reached down deep into their gut and pull forth all their power and placed it fully into their faith in the heart of the cards, and drew. What Yami saw when he opened his eyes shocked him.

* * *

Author's Notes:

Mark: Oh man, don't hate me cause I made a cliffy! I thought it would be more dramatic this way. Anyway, please review with any praise, criticisms, duelists, strategies, or just plain want to, PLEASE DO! That button just looks so lonely, doesn't it? I bet it would make it feel warm and fuzzy inside if you'd just click it, don't you?


	6. Duel Against the Dead, Part 2

Mark: Are you ready to get your jocks rocked by this next chapter? I KNOW I AM! Get some popcorn, sit back, and enjoy.

Disclaimer: Mark owns 0 things of Yu-Gi-Oh! Some original cards and characters might be his, but some might belong to other writers on FFN, namely WolfGeneral, GO READ HIS SHIZ! Also, he doesn't own Chris Rock.

Summary: The duel between Yami and Noctu concludes!

* * *

CHAPTER 6, Duel Against the Dead, Part 2

_I now play Wobki the Healer! This magic card raises my life points by 1000!"_

_Yami 200_

_Noctu 1200_

"_And lastly but not lest, I play the magic card Dark Fusion! This summons the Monster Dark Mist! It is created by sacrificing all monsters with zombie, fiend, or dark subtypes. Which would incorporate all my monsters.! Dark Mist(3500/2450), come forth!" A black mist appeared and gobbled up all five of Noctu's monsters. "Unfortunately I can't waste you this turn. Take your last pathetic move!"_

_Yami called forth Yugi, and the two combined their minds and souls, laid their hand on their deck, then reached down deep into their gut and pull forth all their power and placed it fully into their faith in the heart of the cards, and drew. What Yami saw when he opened his eyes shocked him._

Yami smirked at the card he had drawn, and the eye began to glow on his forehead.

"Nameless Pharaoh, what have you drawn?"

"You shall see what I have drawn in just a little while scum, but all good things come in time. So now I'll start this combo off! I play Queens Knight and Kings Knight!" A women and a man in armor with shields and swords appeared on the field. "Now thanks to their special ability when both Queens Knight and Kings Knight are on the field I can special summon Jacks Knight as well!" A taller knight in green armor with sword in hand appeared.

"I'm not impressed, none of your monsters can destroy my Dark Mist!(3500/2450) It gains the attack and defense points of all monsters that were used to summon it! HAHAHA!"

"Well then it's time to meet the card I drew at the beginning of my turn! I sacrifice Queens Knight, Kings Knight, and Jacks Knight in order to summon this!" Yami's hand flashed across the top of his disk, snatching up his three cards and placing them in the graveyard. 'Thank you for your sacrifice, dear friends.' Then he picked one card from his increasingly small hand and raised it in the air.

"I now summon THE SKY DRAGON OSIRIS(1000/1000)!" And he slapped the card down on his disk, causing red lighting to shoot out of the card. The building began to darken and shudder. Soon the ceiling and walls cracked and the red and black serpent that was Osiris mad it's entrance. "Look upon my Egyptian God Card and despair! For he will be your demise!"

Noctu began to laugh manically, "Your beast is worthless compared to mine, perhaps you'd like to end this silliness and give me your pieces now!"

"Not likely, after I defeat you we should have enough to get out of here. And find the mastermind behind this plot."

Noctu went unusually silent.

"What?" The Pharaoh inquired.

"I only have one of each piece."

The five youths blanched, "Ya mean ya lost ta dat wannabe?" Joey queried confusedly.

"No, that was merely and illusion I created, I had almost all the things needed to escape this mansion, when I came upon Seto Kaiba."

"_Let's get this duel on freak boy."_

"_You've got it, but I warn you, you will fall before my might!"_

"I was doing well for a time, but then something happened I did not for see."

"_Now I play White Dragon Paladin and sacrifice him to call forth my Blue Eyes White Dragon!"_

"_No, this cannot be!"_

"_Blue Eyes, destroy his pathetic Demonic Mirror as well as the last of his life points!"_

The black aura wreathed around Noctu once more. It engulfed him entirely.

"Now Pharaoh, I will beat you, and face Kaiba in the finals!"

"You mean your not a hired duelist?"

"No, I bet that leads you to question how I know about you? Incase you have overlooked, I am a sorcerer, tales of your power are well known to my kind. Now get your turn over with so I may eliminate you from this tournament!"

"Very well, I now play the last card in my hand, Card of Sanctity! This forces both of us to discard our hands and draw until we are holding six cards! And since I have to cards in my hand, all I can do is draw!"

Noctu paled just a little bit more, if that was possible, and discarded his entire and then proceeded to draw six more, he frowned at his cards.

"Draw didn't turn out so good Noctu? Well mine did now Osiris destroy his Dark Mist!"

The sorcerer watched on as the giant dragon formed energy in it's larger mouth, "Bah, you've lost it Pharaoh, my Monster is far stronger than yours!"

"Are you so sure? Take a look at their strengths!"

Sky Dragon Osiris: 6000/6000

Dark Mist (3500/2450)

Noctu's eyes began to flash brilliantly, "WHAT IS THIS? YOU'VE PLAYED NO MAGIC CARD TO INCREASE HIS STRENGTH!"

"My God Card holds many surprises for you Dark One, Now Osiris attack with Thunder Force!"

The Divine Beast let loose then bright energy in it's larger mouth and it exploded on Noctu's side of the field.

Yami looked on with calm, "It's over."

"Not quite!"

Yami 200

Noctu 1200

"But how?!?"

"Fool, my Dark Mist is more ancient than even your dragon! It's first special ability protects my life points whenever it is destroyed. The second states that when sent to the graveyard it is instantly brought back to the field, and then it gains 500 more attack points! Dark Mist, revive yourself now!" A dark fog appeared around Noctu, then it all conglomerated into one large mist. "Dark Mist(4000/2450)has returned!"

"Not so fast with your celebration Noctu. You've activated my God Card's special ability! His second mouth! Whenever a monster is summoned to the field Osiris deals it 2000 points in damage! And revival counts as summoning! Now ATTACK MY DIVINE BEAST!"

Dark Mist 2000/2450

"I end my turn."

Noctu drew and began to howl with laughter. "Fool, your end is nigh! I sacrifice my Dark Mist to bring forth Skull Merchant(2150/1400) in defense mode, but my Dark Mist(2500/2450) revives itself with 500 more attack points!" A skeleton carrying all kinds of goods, fabrics, and weapons on it's back materialized as the Dark Mist vaporized, only to return again.

"You aren't going to be so cocky once you've learned to respect the power of Osiris, ATTACK WITH SECOND MOUTH!" The beast opened it's second mouth and two streams of purple energy collided with Noctu's vile soldiers.

Skull Merchant 150/1400

Dark Mist 500/2450

"That affects nothing in the long run Pharaoh, I lay one card face down and end my turn!"

Yami drew and then was about to attack when got a friendly monition.

'_Yami, look at the card you just drew!'_ Yugi suggested through their mind link.

Yami glanced at the card, 'Yes Yugi, what of it?'

'Well, it could prove useful!'

'Yugi, we're about as likely to need this card than Tristan is to have Chris Rock fall out of his ass. But, as they say, better safe than sorry.' And taking his hikari's advice Yami placed the card in his duel disk. "I lay one card face down, and attack your Skull Merchant with Thunder Force!"

Osiris charged up his attack and fired, destroying the much smaller monster.

"You've activated my trap card Pharaoh!"

"Too bad traps don't affect Egyptian God Monsters."

"Who said the trap affected you! I activate Apparition Recreation! This brings back my Skull Merchant as a Ghost Token!" A Ghost Token Skull Merchant(2150/1400) appeared on the field. "And since he was in defense mode, my life points are safe."

"For now, anyway. I end my turn."

Noctu drew, "Now behold your end Pharaoh, I sacrifice my Dark Mist to summon Nectroll(2300/2000)!" A scrawny humanoid with stretched out skin, long white hair, and fingernails like claws materialized on the field as Dark Mist evaporated, then condensed back onto the field.

"Now I attack with Osiris' second mouth!"

"Not so fast Pharaoh, Nectroll's special ability now kicks in, one the turn he is summoned all special effects are useless, and afterward he is immune to all special effects, so my Nectroll and Dark Mist(1000/2450) won't lose points this turn! Now I am going to activate my Skull Merchant's special ability! Whenever a monster is transformed into a Ghost Token it may fuse with any monster the original monster could for free! Now fuse together my creatures of death! Possession Fusion!" The Skull Merchant Ghost Token went ethereal and leapt into the Nectroll, a dark light emitted from the fusion and a tall old man in dark robes and a long beard wielding a gnarled staff appeared. "Behold the Necromancer(2800/2300)!"

"Fusion also counts as a summoning you fool, now attack with second mouth!"

Necromancer 1800/2300

"HahahahahahaHAHAHAHAHA! Fool, it doesn't matter what you do! For my Necromancer will bring down your silly God Beast. His special ability gives him 300 attack points whenever a monster is sent to the graveyard! So I sacrifice my own Dark Mist! Giving a power boost to my Necromancer(2100/2300)! Now Dark Mist(1000/2450) revives itself, only to be destroyed by your dragons special ability, sending it to the graveyard, which boost my Necromancer (2400/2300)! But then Dark Mist revives again, and the cycle continues! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Yami was awestruck, his Necromancer had an infinite attack point combo! Too strong for his Sky Dragon, how could he let this happen, how could he be defeated, how could he-

'_YAMI!' _

The Pharaoh snapped back to attention. "I CALL OFF MY DRAGONS SPECIAL ABILITY!" And just as the command was given, the beast stopped attacking.

"TOO LATE PHAROAH! MY MONSTER IS TOO POWERFUL FOR YOU TO DEFEAT!"

Necromancer 16200/2450

"HAHAHAHAHAHA! Now I think I'll finish you off with my Darkner Card! After all, it's still in play!" The dark aura that had been surrounding Noctu now grew, and then the Darkner Card itself erupted in dark flame.

Yami 200

Necto 700

A tiny bit of light came out of the Dark Mist, on the other hand, the Necromancer raised his hand and a flood of light escaped and devoured the little light of the Dark Mist.

"Now, the total attack power of 17200 destroy his God Card, NOW!"

"NO! IF THAT DESTROYS OSIRIS YUGI IS DONE FOR!" Tea screamed.

The light launched itself at the Divine Beast, only to glance off harmlessly.

Noctu's eyes went wide with alarm, "WHAT IS GOING ON?!?"

Yami could only chuckle slightly, "Fool, it doesn't matter if it is a Darkner Card, only a few magic cards can effect an Egyptian God Card, and Focus Power isn't one of them."

Noctu's aura became flame-like with rage, "YOU DARE LAUGH AT THE MIGHT OF MY DECK! MY NECROMANCER HAS THE POWER TO DESTROY YOU OF IT'S OWN ACCORD! Now my Necromancer destroy his Beast and the rest of his life points!"

The Necromancer charged up his staff and hurled the unholy energy at Yami's Monster.

"Not so fast Noctu, you have yet to account for my last face down card!" Yami said pointing to the face down card that Yugi had advised him to play, "And now I reveal it! MIRROR FORCE!"

Just inches away from striking Osiris the attack hit an invisible barrier and was absorbed by it, then light shot out in all directions from the barrier and destroyed Noctu's two monsters.

"Way ta go Yug!"

"Good job Pharaoh, good Yugi!"

"Way to sock it too em man!"

Rex, unused to this kind of situation, did what he always did when he didn't know what was going on, he improvised, "Ummm, yay team."

"NOOOO! THIS CANNOT BE! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH MY MONSTERS!"

"Mirror Force deflects your attack right back at you, destroying all your monsters."

Noctu frowned, "Oh well, my Dark Mist(1500/2450) now returns to me!"

Yami quickly reacted, "Hold your fire Osiris." His beast shut his second mouth just as he had began to open it.

"I end my turn Pharaoh."

Yami placed his hand on his deck and drew, after glancing a his new card Yami was all smiles. "I now play the magic card Brain Control!" A giant brain appeared and with phantom hands reached out to Dark Mist and dragged it over to Yami's side of the field.

"I now use it to take control of your Dark Mist, leaving you wide open for an attack! Now, SKY DRAGON OSIRIS, LIBERATE HIM OF HIS LIFE POINTS!"

Osiris charged up and fired.

"NO, I WILL NOT LOSE!" Noctu declared as he sent his dark aura to destroy the attack, only to have his survival attempt brushed aside by the attack. "WHAT? I DON'T UNDERSTAND! HOW CAN MY MAGIC BE DEFEATED BY A HOLOGRAM?!?"

Yami felt gracious enough to provide the answer, "You're a sorcerer, take a close look at the cards sometime and you'll see, that the monsters are real!"

The energy of the Thunder Force attack engulfed Noctu, and as the holograms cleared, he was found laying unconscious, on the ground.

Yami 200

Noctu 0

"Yay Yugi!"

"Way to be, Yu-GI!"

"I gotta admit Moto, you did good."

"Ya! Dats our Yug!"

"Thank you, thank you." Yami said, walking over to the body of Noctu. He picked up a key piece and a puzzle piece, as well as the card Focus Power. "Rex, lend me your key piece."

Rex reached into his pocket and tossed the golden half handle to Yami, "Ok, here you go."

Yami caught it and took his own piece out of his pocket. He took the small cylinder he won from Dawes, then he took the two identical pieces that Noctu and Rex had produced. They both looked like a 3 leaf clover that had been cut in 2. He put one on each side of the cylinder and in a small burst of light, they fused together to form the handle to the key.

Yami sighed, "Just two more pieces to go.

* * *

" 

Authors Notes:

Oh baby, that was by far the longest chapter yet! Please review with praise, critisms, advice, or just because you want to! Anything at all, just review!

Original cards used in the past two chapters:

Valkyrie Spirit

Focus Power

Dark Fusion

Dark Mist

Skull Merchant

Appartion Recreation

Skull Merchant Ghost Token

Nectroll

Necromancer


End file.
